"There are some really crazy people in this world. And sometimes I think they all have my email address." --Andy Wibbels
I think all internet biz owners can relate to Andy's well-spoken sentiments.
We are a fabulous melting pot of psychological diversity (this is putting it nicely
), and while this may be endlessly interesting in some ways, when you're trying to conduct business via the internet, you really need to come up with a way to control who you let into your life and who gets a piece of your time.
Some folks call this the "Ideal Client Profile", but I get a kick out of Andy's terminology for it cuz he tells it like it is.
It's a "freak filter", pure and simple, and as small biz owners we are in charge of creating an early warning detection system that will save us time, money, frustration, and a gazillion bottles of Tylenol.
Freak identification marks
It's true that on many levels freakiness is purely subjective. One man's freak is another man's ideal client, but in general, I think most small biz owners will agree that a freak has the following attributes:
1) Wants our help really, really badly, yet has no money to pay us with
2) Needs an awful lot of work to be completed in a ridiculously short amount of time at a moment's notice
3) Is looking for a miracle--let me site the guy with the poorly written e-book who wanted me to help him get on Oprah (Oy!)
4) Only wants to communicate in-person or over the phone and does not like to use email and IM.
5) Anyone who says they need to meet me in person to verify that I'm "real". 
These are just a few off the top of my head--please feel free to share some of your own "freak identification marks" in the comments if any come to mind.
Crafting the filter
A more positive way of looking at the freak filter would be, instead of weeding people out, what you can actually do is filter in the types of people who you want to work with (this is what I do).
In order to do this, you need to have a very good image in your mind of who you want to work with.
Here are the criteria I use:
Personality--this is the most important element for me. Even if all other criteria are thumbs up, if we don't click personality wise, then it's no-go.
Niche/Target Market--If you have a tight niche/target market, this does a lot of the screening for you.
Retainer hours--This is just me, but I like to work with just a few clients and that means I work with them on a daily basis, which in turn means I have set retainer hours that will allow me to support clients in this way. Having set retainer hours helps me weed out folks who don't want daily, long-term support.
Fee--The higher the fee you have, the more folks you will filter out (this is a good thing).
These are just a few of the criteria I use, but basically what I do is formulate in my mind the type of person I'd like to work with, and I use the above filters to help keep me focussed on the prize.
So, I don't focus so much on weeding out; I focus on weeding in, or I guess a better way of saying it would be to say that I focus on "attracting" a very specific type of person with a very specific type of business.
It's sort of like when you set up filters for email, and you take a few minutes one day to set them up, and then every day after that all you have to do is click a button and sit back and watch the filters do the sorting work for you.
I find that the same is true for the client filter--if you make your decisions on the front end about who you want to work with and what kind of work you want to do, then all you have to do is follow the filters, and making client decisions is pretty painless. Having the filters in place also frees you up to focus on what you do want, instead of fending off what you don't want.
Does anyone have any "freak filtering" ID marks, techiniques, or special approaches for attracting a certain type of client? Please share!
(Stunning Donald Sutherland image created by Andy Wibbels.)
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